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It's not Your Fault!





It was the ‘loudest’ I had ever heard in a long time. It was freaking scary. I wanted to close my eyes but couldn’t because at the same time I wanted to witness what happens. The bus that carried my friends and I loses control and flies over a ditch. Only my friends are hurt. Myself, the driver and the rest of the passengers are not affected. The driver looks at me with an indifferent face and immediately tells me that I was to blame for the accident. He then jumps out of the bus and calls the other passengers at a distance. They starts talking is low tones. The driver comes back and tells me I was NOT to blame for anything .He then orders me out of the bus and takes me to sit on a raised rock a few meters away from the scene while the rest of the passengers are discussing in low tones.  Guilt conscious creeps in; I am scared, confused and I can no longer see my friends. One of the passengers walks towards me and asks, “why is the driver blaming you for the accident?’ I raised my head up and told her I did not understand either. She then goes back and joins the rest of the passengers. The driver walks back to me again and assures me that I was not to blame. He soon goes back to the crowd and continues with the discussion. Soon I see one of my friends who was slightly hurt and I ask her to go ask them why they blamed me for the accident. As soon as she gets there, the driver and the passengers turn against her with stones. She then runs towards me …shouting, ‘let’s run, let’s run, lets run Dinah….’ The crowd is very fast and they are almost catching up with us! I immediately wake up .., looks at my clock and its 3.36 AM. Phew! It was just a bad dream!

I soon recall that during the week I had came close to an accident and it could have influenced my dream. So I sit up and reflect on the dream and relate it to the many ‘accidents’ that happen in everyday life. The truth of the matter is that sometimes things just happen; we find ourselves involved but cannot tell how... Many times we blame ourself for things we have no control over. Whether it’s the accident or the passengers talking in low tones, or other factors in life.

Once a mishap happens in our life, we tend to feel so crippled. Our emotions are drained, relationships strained, finances depleted.  That’s normal. Its very obvious you almost want to blame yourself for what you did or did not do. Do not do that .It’s okay to cry, mourn or feel sorry about the accident. Do not be ashamed of the tears, even the strongest person needs someone every often to take their hand and assure them that everything will be okay.  All the same we cannot stop living because an accident happened; No. we have to move on and yes I understand sometimes it’s very hard to move on, but once you do, you will realize it was the best decision you ever made. When mishaps happen in life God will send friends who will run with you during that time. These friends are not always seen just like the starts; however they are more visible at night when you need them most.

So what to do after an accident, you ask? Keep going, do not stop traveling ever. Keep at it.... If you can not run just walk...just make sure you are on the move. Travel as much as you can, as far as you can, as long as you can. Life’s not meant to be lived in one place. But above all embrace reality that an accident happened .Sometimes you have to accept the fact that certain things may never go back to how they used to be. All the same No winter lasts forever, no spring skips it turn; nobody can go back and begin a new beginning, but anyone can start today and make a new ending. ‘It’s never too late to jump into a new bus in life. 

Love unconditionally, forgive easily. If you are the driver, a co-driver or a passenger in the bus, do not blame anyone for any accident in life. It was not their fault. Practice kindness, it makes you the most beautiful person in the world no matter what you look like. Be a rainbow in someone else cloud. Be nice to all including those who do not like you in the bus of life. That does not make you fake, it only means you are mature enough to tolerate their dislike. Sometimes life accidents make us stronger because we have to be. So be strong. You will realize most strong people in life may not have an easy past.so you are one of the strongest of this world.

Never, ever get rid of the desire to climb a tree just because you fell once. Never lose sleep over something that isn’t worth staying awake for. It’s absolutely OK to appreciate that some days are just harder than others.The truth is that It will soon be just another chapter in your success story. The best revenge in life’s accidents is the success in overcoming obstacles

It’s now 5: 24 am and I have to go back to bed.

By Dinah Muthuka (Un edited)

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